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Funny
The Onion Reviews ‘E.T.’
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Man Opens Up About Childhood Trauma Of Being Forced To Put On Jammies
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Artificial Intelligence Explains Why Humans Have Nothing To Worry About
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Tariff-Strained Apple Announces 7,083-Piece iPhone Kit
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New Law Requires S_x Offenders To Wear Tinted Sunglasses, Cut-Off Shorts
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JD Vance Rushed To Walter Reed After Inner Hillbilly Returns
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FDA Official: "Just Eat A Goddamn Vegetable"
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The Onion Reviews ‘John Wick’
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JD Vance Rushed To Walter Reed After Inner Hillbilly Returns
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Multiple Stab Wounds May Be Harmful To Monkeys
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JD Vance Rushed To Walter Reed After Inner Hillbilly Returns | Onion News Network
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‘Gays Too Precious To Risk In Combat,’ Says General
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213 Killed In How Do You Pronounce That?
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The Onion Reviews ‘Mission Impossible’
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213 Killed In How Do You Pronounce That?
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Ultra Realistic Modern Warfare Game Features Awaiting Orders, Repairing Trucks
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213 Killed In How Do You Pronounce That?
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104-Year-Old Man Awarded WWII Medal Just To Be Nice
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U.S. Military Bans Men With Girl Names From Participating In Combat
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Honor Our Troops By Watching Over This Sleeping Soldier
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U.S. Military Bans Men With Girl Names From Participating In Combat
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Perfectly Good Tire Just Sitting There Behind The Kroger
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U.S. Military Bans Men With Girl Names From Participating In Combat
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The Onion’s June 2025 Bestseller List
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U.S. Military Bans Men With Girl Names From Participating In Combat
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GOP Maintains Solid Hold On Youth That Already Look Like Old Men
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Troubled Democrats To Undergo Party Counseling
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Ear Of Genetically Modified Corn Begs For Death
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Mother Extremists Hijack Airwaves To Broadcast Photos Of Their Children
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Study Finds Growing Gap Between America’s Rich and Super Rich
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Mother Extremists Hijack Airwaves To Broadcast Photos Of Their Children
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Experts Agree Giant, Bioengineered Crabs Pose No Threat
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Mother Extremists Hijack Airwaves To Broadcast Photos Of Their Children | Onion News Network
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Nation Successfully Completes Mother’s Day By 9:18 AM
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12 Year Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams
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Signal For New Pope Delayed While Dead Raccoon Dislodged From Sistine Chapel Chimney
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You seem obedient. Visit the newly redesigned theonion.com.
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Many U S Parents Outsourcing Child Care Overseas
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The Onion Reviews ‘Captain America Civil War’
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Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database
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Anonymous Hero Donates Hospital 200 Human Kidneys
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Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database
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The Onion Reviews Avengers Age Of Ultron
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Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database
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Are Tests Biased Against Students Who Don’t Give A Shit
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Dalai Lama Tapped As Interim Pope
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Trump Announces Seal Team 6 Killed U.S. Protester In Daring Overnight Raid
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Death Of Chopped-Up Woman Ruled A Suicide
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Samsung Releases New Wearable Computer
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Trump Announces Seal Team 6 Killed U.S. Protester In Daring Overnight Raid
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Town’s Teen Pregnancy Spike Due To One Impressive Youth
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